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Thank God ,our little Einstein has got her place in the kindergarten


Her percentile is high and she knows all about the cube and rhombus
She should better get ready in uniform and tie to board the school bus
Her cram sessions are thorough and she knows even sphere and trapezoid
She now sits confidently with her i-pod and smart phones on android
And feels on top of the world with an assured place in the kindergarten
With so much cram ,she will have no admissions problems to dishearten.


She didn’t swig Red Bull from a sippy cup to pull all-nighters, but Taylor Dior started cramming at age 3 for what some New Yorkers think is the most important test of her life — getting into kindergarten.

Her mom, Chavon Peele, paid up to $79 a month to a private service for access to 1,000 sample questions that she says gave Taylor the skills needed to ace the city’s Gifted and Talented test.

They worked together 45 minutes most nights so that tiny Taylor, soon after turning 4, could discern patterns, do analogies, understand concepts such as “greater than,” and recognize a rhombus, among other tough tasks.
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/preschool_tots_cram_sessions_PFXTm5lmESTcg9Cwi55EYK

 
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Posted by on July 11, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Famous last lines

The New York Times is our most highly respected newspaper
With eye-ball grabbing headlines, its content highly dapper.

But it is their bottom-lines that have to be watched in the last.
Look for bottom lines like those that speak of a cabbies forecast
Borne out by geopolitical developments, leaving you completely aghast.

Then there are people dead, survived by son by first marriage
And second wife Mary, surely an interesting situation at any age.

A celebrity plans to quit career to do own things he loved, really
Like things such as raising family, going to school, however silly.

Of course we love their headlines shining on the outside wrapper
But it is the last lines that take the cake making the paper dapper.

The poor bridegroom is the son of Barbara and Stan Miller of Avon
It is not his fault his dad is the founder of a hedge fund in Darien.

The bride, who until recently ,had a job as a pilates instructor
The marriage has primarily acted for her as a career destructor.

The paper is known for its celebration of the English tongue
Its grammar and usage have won kudos in every parlor and lounge
NYU isn’t likely to please Greenwich Village residents anytime soon.
It cannot help if this novel usage makes our grammar teacher swoon.

Here is a list of popular endings to New York Times pieces. It’s totally free.

http://www.vanityfair.com/online/daily/2011/03/behind-the-paywall-how-new-york-times-articles-end.html

 
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Posted by on July 9, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

You get banned from tennis if you grunt loudly in your play


You get banned from tennis if you grunt loudly in play
You see, such noises distract the other players all day
Less distracting sounds like passing the wind seem okay.

Maria Sharapova has been criticized over her extremely loud grunting during play, but you can bet they won’t try this with a champion like her. A 9-year-old Australian girl has been banned from playing tennis at her local club over the grunting noises she makes during play.
Lauryn Edwards was told last weekend that she could no longer play after an opposing player complained about her grunting”

http://snafu-ed.blogspot.com/2008/02/9-year-old-sharapova-wanna-be-banned.html

 
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Posted by on October 13, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

He felt sad and forlorn,watching all alone the porn

He felt sad and forlorn,watching alone all the porn.
He actually liked all of you to feel equally love-lorn
And screened it for all ye, high-born and low-born!

“A TECHNICIAN at a French Polynesian television station has been suspended from work after accidentally screening a porn movie he thought he was watching alone”

 
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Posted by on October 13, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

These scholarly pursuits will stimulate the intellectual in you

It is true poo is serious stuff not merely belonging to the loo
Poo smells a lot but tells a lot too, useful like the didgeridoo
View it like a regular for a scatological analysis in your loo
These scholarly pursuits will stimulate the intellectual in you.

Get grossed out, laugh or act like you’re too refined to discuss this. Go ahead. The truth is, poop is serious stuff. If you’re willing to peek into the toilet bowl once in a while, local doctors say you can learn loads about your health and detect problems ranging from poor diet to colon cancer. “It’s one of a few things you can do without a doctor’s help. You can’t do blood work on yourself … but you can look in the toilet,” said Dr. Anish Sheth, a gastroenterologist and co-author of the book, “What’s Your Poo Telling You?” and the soon-to-be-released sequel, “Poo Log”.

 
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Posted by on October 13, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

All the world is a stage and all men and women merely players


Without booze and fag we cannot think of a bar
If we cannot have our bar without nicotine and tar
we shall deem our bar as Shakespearean theater.
All the world is a stage and men players says the bard.

Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more.

It is a tale told by an idiot full of smoke and fury
Our lungs are black like Macbeth’s dark deeds

And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death.

“Bars in Minnesota are declaring themselves theatres to get around a public smoking ban.
The state ban allows actors to light up in character during theatrical productions.
So the bars are declaring themselves theatres and their customers performers, reports the Daily Telegraph.“

http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_2761092.html?

 
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Posted by on August 24, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

They believe that Mountain Dew prevents pregnancy


All through the night we make passionate love
under the stars,me and you.
Our torrid love affair goes on ,
duly protected by the mountain dew.
In the friendly company of the mountain goat
and the sheep and the ewe.

ORLANDO, Fla. — A recent survey that found some Florida teens believe drinking a cap of bleach will prevent HIV and a shot of Mountain Dew will stop pregnancy has prompted lawmakers to push for an overhaul of sex education in the state.”

 
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Posted by on August 24, 2010 in Uncategorized

 
 
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